Swazi PRO: Red Ants

“THIS IS NOT A GAME!” the words of one Mr Phillipe van der Leeuw ringing in my ears all too often at various points along the 446km route… Apparently that was his way of letting ‘Muffin Girl’ (a.k.a Jane Swarbreck) know that THIS WAS NOT A GAME, as this was Swazi X, and her first long race! Although Tim and I thought this was a great game of hide and seek, concocted in some twisted way by Swazi cartographers and race organisers, who may have been indulging in that moist green bush that grows in Swaziland. Of these truths or untruths we may never know the answer, but what we do know, is that THIS WAS NOT A GAME.

Swazi X 2010 was real, no holds barred, full on HD 3D entertainment! (Something Red Ants enjoy all too often for one’s own good and loss of brain cells is part of the HD experience).

With most of the original Red Ants team deciding that THE 10th AND FINAL Swazi Xtreme was not for them, it was up to me to co-op some unsuspecting friends into this Game. After some searching, phone calls and emails, the Red Ants had swarmed and the colony was once again on the move. This time the Ants would invade the fabled hills of Swaziland with Phillipe “I train 24hrs a week” van der Leeuw, Tim “so when can we sleep?” Deane, Muffin Girl (a.k.a Jane “this is my first long AR” Swarbreck) and me; Brian “the last standing Red Ant” Gardner.

The Red Ants were pampered, protected and fed by our outstanding seconds Walter “I led the convoy to T5” Dhooge and Hardus “where’s my bike?” de Bruyn. Who can however forget the amazing back massages we got in transition from one of Team Khakibos’s seconds, Inge “massage therapist” van Rooyen. You guys frikken ROCK!

After months of preparations, training, logistics and organising, the 10th and final Swazi Extreme in full HD 3D had arrived.

Race briefing

It was at race briefing that one Darron Raw divulged that this Swazi was packed with “added value” in the Pro event, and teams wanting to compete should get all the OP’s. Great, ADDED VALUE and fun! So our strategy was easy, race hard, collect all OP’s, have fun, enjoy the added value and get a good sleep on Sunday night. Huh? Not quite. Darron held his cards close to his chest and never really told us what REAL “added value” entailed, although we did know that this involved a few added Km’s here and there. Right, off to sleep on this ADDED VALUE statement…

Leg 1: Hike (12km)

It was 6am on Friday the 6th of August and Swazi was on! Teams lined up for the start of the swansong of all AR swansongs. This first hike/ run would be crucial; we felt that a good start was what we needed. We were off and jogging through Nisela Game reserve in the chilled pre-dawn air with Team Jabberwok for company. Muffin Girl was briefed thoroughly before the race to not expect a fast pace on a long race, as she had been used to high paced racing on the shorter races she had done, but alas, this illusion would come back to bite on the first run. The ‘time trial’ had begun. We made short work of the run, colleting the 2 OP’s on the hill and getting into T1 just behind Jabberwok.

Leg 2: MTB (93km)

We mounted our MTB’s at T1 and were hot-on-the-heals of Jabberwok, with SPORT and ‘non-OP searching’ PRO teams all around us. It wasn’t long before we caught Jabberwok and rode with them for a while through the Swaziland lowveld. We had just snuck ahead of Jabberwok at an intersection, but on the approach to OP100P (Gauging Weir), I managed to get us onto a foot path at just the wrong angle down to the river, which evidently popped us out at the river about 1km downstream from the OP. Damn, stupid mistake, but when tracks are running all over the place, and with the Swazi cartographers taking another puff of their green Swazi bush when map making, it was fairly easy to do. On arrival at the river, we realised the mistake straight away and found a pretty decent single track next to the river which led us right up to the OP at the weir. Not much time lost, but irritating none the less!

At this point, we were going strong and all feeling pretty good. The rest of the bike leg to T2 at the paddle start was just one long slog, with a quick stop at a roadside shop to refuel on coke and sprite. At this point, Jabberwok had extended their lead to about 45mins.

Leg 3: Canal Paddle (17km)

After a quick transition and a bite to eat, we were off to the paddle put-in at the start of the irrigation canal. In training sessions on Emmarentia Dam it was decided that Jane and I were driving the 2 boats. Jane having never steered a boat down anything flowing before, was told to try and stick to my rudder and follow my line. Well that plan lasted about 200m down the canal, when Phil and Jane took a liking to the overhanging tree and tipped. Not a bad swim mind-you, they saved it pretty well, seeing as though you could stand in the canal. After some short discussion and boat emptying, Muffin Girl joined me in the back of my boat and Tim was upgraded to driver in the other.

The paddle, which ensued was uneventful but a welcome relief to the legs after 100km of fairly fast-paced hiking and MTBing in the morning.

Leg 4: Hike (8km)

Arriving at T3 we made quick work of the transition and were on our way to T4 at Van Eck dam on the outskirts of Big Bend. The sun was setting as we approached CP18, which for all intents and purposed was “misplaced”. It turns out that the Swazi cartographers were once again up to their tricks and the CP was actually plotted in the right place, but roads on the map didn’t quite make sense. After searching for a good 10mins we decided to take one quick look down the road, and viola, there it was… Leaving me somewhat bamboozled as to the accuracy of the map?? Anyway, we were back on track and heading to T4 with gusto. A short search for OP104 along the way cost us about 10 mins but we found it in the fading light and were all smiles hiking into T4.

We had no idea what lay ahead from this point, as this is where we got our next set of maps for the next few legs, and also more of an insight into Darron’s added value!

Leg 5: Hike (17km)

Our seconds were once again on hand to provide us with a fantastic pasta meal, whilst Muffin Girl and Phil attended to sore and blistered feet. Some quick calculations of distances and confirmation of the lack of roads on the map, we were on our way into the Swazi darkness. The initial stages of the hike were fast and flat, and we were able to attempt a fair AR shuffle for most of the way to CP21. It must however be noted that we junctioned with the canal on which the CP was located a little way to the south, which caused some unneeded confusion amongst the ranks. A quick bearing sorted that and we finally arrived at CP21. A time check with the marshal confirmed that we were still about an hour behind Jabberwok, so we were at least not losing massive time and were still moving well.

With CP21 brought the start of the track up the Lebombo’s. 600m ascent in less than 2km of foot path. Muffin Girl being once again reminded in no uncertain terms by Phil that THIS IS NOT GAME as we huffed and puffed our way up to the top of the Lebombo’s! Muffin Girl slowly coming to realise that this could be a longer and harder game that predicted… On summiting the Lebombo’s on foot, it was a short 4km walk to T5. Once again aimless traipsing on a wide dirt road induced the dreaded Sleep Monster in some team mates, and we think Muffin Girl had her first encounter with him too…

Leg 6: MTB (75km)

T5 at the mountain top school was an unassisted transition, and we were quick to don the cycling shoes and head off in the darkness for a cycle back to T4 at Van Eck Dam. The navigation for the first section was straightforward, and an awesome 6km downhill off the top of the Lebombo’s and back into the lowveld was the highlight of this ride! You just gotta love hurtling off a mountain at 50kmph with only bike lights to guide the way. (That’s always when you wish you had better lights!). Being joined by Alex Pope and Paul Bothma of Cipralex, we found the first couple of OP’s on this leg fairly easily, but the combination of tiredness and endless tracks leading in all directions in the sugarcane plantation put pay to us finding OP209 at the “pump house”. Having finally determined where we were on the map after some uncertainly, I decided to hit the tar road, skip OP209, and head straight back to T4. We arrived just before 6am in the morning, and just caught the start of the SPORT teams heading off on their next stage.

Leg 7: MTB (14km)

We had had a long night on the bikes and were feeling the pace at this point. The next couple of legs would be long and we would only be seeing our seconds much later in the day again. Tim, Phil and Jane took the time to get 30mins of sleep whilst I worked on the maps for the next few sections of the race. Knowing full well that this would be a long day, we took our time in transition before heading off for a quick 14km MTB to the paddle put-in.

Leg 8: River Paddle (18km)

With none of us really having much river paddling experience, except for experience gained through adventure racing over the years, we surprised even ourselves and had a flawless paddle through the beautiful Lusutfu River valley! Not one swim for either boat through all the Grade 1 and 2 rapids ensured we kept a good rhythm on the paddle (except for those damn sand-banks which popped up all over the place!). Jane and Phil were having a grand ‘ol time on the river, being dragged over every sand bank we hit by Tim and I. Sitting in the front of the K2 meant that we (Tim and I) always jumped out and dragged the boat to deeper water, whilst Jane and Phil in the back looked like they were on holiday. Phil of course reminded Jane that despite the illusion to the contrary, THIS IS NOT A GAME!

Leg 9: Hike (22km)

Having loved being off our feet for a good 3 hours whilst in the boat, the ensuing 22km hike was a fair shock to the system. Not much can be said for this insane slog up the mountain and out of the Lusutfu Valley, except that this is where we realised that Sleep Monsters can actually be encountered during day-light hours. Evidence of this was tabled by Phil who decided to take a closer look at the flora on the side of the road, before realising that it was in fact the sleep monster behind that tree. We again realised that THIS IS NOT A GAME, and we had many hours still to race, so we all zoned out for a 20 minute power nap under the blazing Swazi sun. For those who think sleep-walking is for night-time only, be well advised that your facts need revision! We hiked for a while with Alex and Paul of Cipralex, and collected the 2 OP’s on route to T8 as the sun was setting on day 2.

This long hard hike certainly took its toll on our feet, as some good time was spent at T8 remedying feet and fuelling our bodies with excellent spaghetti bolognaise before heading out once again. Inge was once again on hand with superb back massages! We should have taken a power nap, but the mist was rolling in and the drizzle started to come down. With no gazebo in transition, we decided to push on so as to not get wet and cold with the drizzle! In hind’s sight, a sleep would have been good at this point, to recharge batteries before the long night ahead.

Leg 10: MTB (60km)

Leaving transition well fed and watered, we collected OP300 and then went in a few small circles trying to locate the single track at OP207. Muffin Girl also had a fairly hilarious encounter with the sleep monster during the initial stages of this bike leg; as she politely asked me why I was wearing an umbrella on my helmet to keep it dry and why there were mice running all over the road!!!?? That was a classic! Sleep monsters do weird and wonderful things!

On finding the track at OP207, it was a blissful downhill MTB back into the lowveld. This track was insanely rocky and steep, and caution was the name of this game. Tim, however, still managed to make a well-calculated purchase of some Swazi bushveld on the way down. He certainly bought a quality turf, but his wrist that he injured 2 weeks prior to Swazi was now starting to flair up wildly and he struggled to hold onto the handle bars from then on in. Tough guy, true AR spirit shown! “THIS IS NOT A GAME!”

Having narrowly negotiated the decent of the Lebombo’s for the second time in 24 hours on the Mountain bikes (both times in the dark let me add!), we headed north towards T9, stopping for a quick rendezvous with the Holy Ghost School at OP301. Finding this OP was however not without incident. On approaching the area, we were not more than a kilometre away when I decided that some direction from “friendly” locals would not go amiss, as sometimes confirmation from locals that where you were heading was in fact correct…

Well, contrary to our previous encounters with the Swazi locals, this one didn’t really go down well with two young men. I left my team on the “main” road, and cycled not more than 50m off the main road to ask two guys who were just alighting from a car. Keeping my distance, I greeted politely and asked if the school was in that direction (pointing). Not getting any reaction or greeting in return, I asked again, but sensed that something wasn’t quite right. I immediately turned my bike around and mounted it, by which time one of the youths had walked a half circle around a clump of aloes, and his direction indicated to me that he was going to try and cut me off from my escape route, and still not uttering a word despite my questions. I summed this situation up very quickly despite my sleep deprived sate, and hit the pedals hard to escape back up the road. As that happened, this (most likely beer saturated) youth ran at full speed after me shouting derogatory remarks and trying in vain to grab hold of me as I sped up the hill! My team heard all of this and the youth stopped short of running all the way to where Tim, Phil and Jane were sitting. Heaven help that fellow if he did get hold of me, with all of us now pumped full of adrenalin!

Needless to say, we were all wide awake for the rest of the bike to T9. (O, and we did find Holy Ghost School OP by the way)

Leg 11: Hike (18km)

Arriving in transition well pumped on adrenalin after the ‘attempted mugging’ (or whatever that fellow had in mind!), we didn’t really consider sleeping, and hit the hiking leg right away, as we were all wide awake. Once again, hind sight is a great sight. We should have slept and recharged, as the wheels come off in the next 3 hours or so… We nailed OP302, 303 and 304 on the head, but CP36 proved to be our nemesis. We had a set plan to attack CP36, but soon after arriving at OP304, we came across a male pair team who claimed to have bund-bashed for hours. This immediately made me think that the bushveld between us the CP was thick and impenetrable, so we opted for plan B which was to hike around the bush and join up with the Cordon fence on the other side. That seems pretty easy, or so we thought. We were joined at this point by Team Here be Dragons, and attempted to tackle the conundrum together.

After a couple of hours of back and forth we decided to retreat to our last point of certainty, OP304. (Later to discover we were on a different cordon fence only 300m away from the one we wanted, at exactly the same altitude, going in exactly the same direction). Huh. It’s amazing what tiredness can do to one’s reasoning and sense of direction. Anyway, we backtracked to the last OP and hit a bearing through the bush to the CP, being at a loss for words as to how that stuff-up happened. Now we should have done that bearing right from the start, instead we lost 3 hours bumbling around the bush, when the “bundu bashing” as described by the male pair we encountered earlier didn’t really materialize. Well, you win some you lose some, that’s AR!

The sun was starting to rise on day 3, and we were joined for the hike from CP36 to T10 by Lisa and Bruce. Having lost considerable time, we skipped the OP’s around Siteki town and headed straight for T10. At some point nearing T10 Jane must have eaten something that us guys didn’t, because on the final 2 odd km’s to the transition she kicked into overdrive and outran us. Huh, so us tough guys took it on the chin and told Jane that long haul AR is not always about running, and that she should conserve herself (however, knowing full well that we had been truly OUTRUN on that section!!)

Arriving somewhat disgruntled and discouraged we still had no idea how far to go on this value added race. It was like a buy one, get one free lucky packet. We got our final maps for last 2 legs at T10 and eventually these maps had “finish” printed on them. We had now raced for about 52 hours and still had, on my calculation at the time, about 16 hours to go. Wrrrrong again!! THIS IS NOT A GAME!

Leg 12: Hike (17km)

The last 52 hours of non-stop racing had taken its toll. We had covered over 350km from the start, and still had about 100km to go, and had only had about 45mins of sleep in total. Our feet were sore, the sun was blazing and we were now attempting to chase down the 2pm cut off at the Jumar. Jane was in a different league at this point, and following on from her outrunning us into transition, she followed that up with some inspirational hiking and running to the kloof, leaving me gasping for breath at the back of the line! She is going to be a super-star!

We once again caught Alex and Paul from Cipralex and plunged into the kloof together. Having negotiated the first few steep sections, we kicked again, and ran through the kloof to try and make the cut-off, but time was short, it was now about 1:30pm. With ourselves, Alex and Paul bashing through the kloof, we somehow missed the OP which indicated the split to the jumar. Having passed it and then realising our mistake about 15mins later, we backtracked, and eventually found it. It was now 2pm and we had missed the jumar cut-off, arriving there at 2:25pm. There were still teams on the ropes and stories told that some teams waited 3 hours to jumar! Even though we missed official cut-off, we could have still done the jumar, but it was getting late and we reasoned that scrambling out of the kloof would be quicker that jumaring.

Our reasoning worked, as we scrambled out to the top, just as one of the members of Team Gijima who was on the rope when we were below, topped out. By this stage the sun was blazing and the cliff jump was welcome relief! Tim and I negotiated the jump whist Phil and Jane attended to some sore feet! It was great, and I wish we could have hung around, but time was ticking!!

We upped our pace once again and headed for T11, our last transition, finally! We were scheduled for a quick transition and Tao (the marshal at T11), came over to us about 15mins into our transition and said that if we don’t leave in the next 10mins, would not be allowed to leave and that would be our race done! This galvanised us into action, but deep down I know we all felt like a good nights rest! This was where the mental strength of the entire team shone through, and our will to finish was huge. We were broken physically, but mentally still strong and in the Game! (But this is not a Game, is it?)

Leg 13: MTB (75km)

We were now lying in 2nd place behind Kinetic after our shenanigans on Leg 11, but we still didn’t know exactly how many OP’s they had, and if we might still be in with a fighting chance. Jabberwok had had to pull out earlier in the race, so it was now up to Kinetic and us to race to the line.

Now if ever one talks of a “sting in the tail”, this exact leg in this exact place would be what they were talking about. Darron’s sense of humour was out of control, and our sense of humour was left somewhere near T11. Needless to say, the last 75-80km MTB was an EPIC end to an EPIC event, and most truthfully an EPIC end to what has been 10 extreme years of Swazi X!

Being sore and tried, we totally missed CP45, which had been wind blown around to the other side of the pole and we couldn’t see it from the direction we were coming from! Some negotiations with Team Yoshimi and we were backtracking a kilometre or so to find CP45. Approaching it from that angle, we found it first time! We were finally on our way down the craziest, rocky and most outright ridiculous track Swazi had thrown at us thus far, (with the help of some friendly locals pointing us in the right direction down the mountain!) and once at the bottom, we had to hike-a-bike back out of the valley. Nice one Darron!

Phil kept reminding a hyperventilating Muffin Girl that THIS WAS NOT A GAME, and that we need to push on for this game to finally end. During this hike-a-bike out of the valley, I became really sick and proceeded to vomit my lungs out on the side of the mountain. I put it down to dehydration, but at 10 at night, it seemed a little weird? Anyway Phil took over navigation duties for a while, Tim fed me with rehydrate and we were back up and on our way to CP46 after a few minutes. We eventually hiked our bikes up to the right road about 1km west of the CP, so had to back-track slightly, collect the CP and head on out along the jeep-track to CP47.

We again found Alex and Paul from Cipralex along the route and teamed up to finish this EPIC race together. We made fairly good time from then on in, and decided to skip the OP’s and head around to the next CP on the tar road through Siteki. The sun was just about coming up when we stopped for coke and chocolate at the petrol station in Siteki, which had seen a roaring trade of smelly adventure racers by the time we arrived, so they didn’t even bat an eyelid at our physical appearance! I was feeling much better now, and took the map back from Phil for the final run into the finish.

With the sun up, headlamps off and Darron’s ‘fast finish’ to come, we left Siteki in haste for our final destination, Simunye Club. The fast finish wasn’t that fast at all, but at least there were no big mountains between us and Simunye. We raced along with Cipralex and shared our war stories of the epic race that was drawing to a close. Muffin Girl was however still absolutely certain that there was one last HUGE mountain to come, and that she couldn’t face it, and we should go around it (??!!), she wasn’t even Navigating, I think the sleep monster got her hook line a sinker! A humorous end to long slog!

Without further incident, and no navigational difficulties (thank goodness) we arrived to a warm welcome at Simunye club after 75 hours and 28 minutes of racing at 9:30am on Monday morning. We were BROKEN. We had finished in 2nd place behind Team Kinetic, who had a solid race, and showed us that slightly slower and steadier (with more sleep) wins the day! Well done guys!

To Alex and Paul, thanks for keeping us company at so many points on the race, and to my fellow team mates, it was a pleasure racing with you! Thanks to Darron, Anita, the marshals, our awesome seconds (Walter and Hardus) and everyone else who supported and cheered for Team Red Ants, THANK YOU!! We could not have finished this EPIC race without you! Thanks for making the last Swazi so memorable!

THIS WAS NOT A GAME, this was the SWAZI EXTREME, in real life, full added-value HD 3D, and we’re sad to see it end.

Author: Brian Gardner, Team Red Ants | Swazi Xtreme PRO, 6-8 August 2010